I have met many people who I call rescuers, that is people who get involved in other people’s problems. They almost become addicted to it and think it is their duty to get involved in other people’s lives. They cannot say no and have no boundaries. People can call them day and night.
The rescuer can make them feel better for a short period of time by giving them all their own energy, but after a while they will come back to refill. They just dump their issues onto the rescuer and the rescuer will feel bad. The rescuer does not know how to protect him-/herself from the negative energy that these people have dumped on them and the rescuer will start feeling depressed.
Unfortunately, the people that they are trying to help are not really listening they just want everybody else to fix things for them. The rescuer does not realise that the only people you can help are those that are ready to play a part and take responsibility and do not go into the victim mode: “Feel sorry for me.” The end result is, the rescuer become so infected by other people feelings they reach a point of giving up themselves, because they do not know what they are doing to themselves.
If someone is sick or has an accident etcetera of course you will support them during their time of crisis. That is compassion, but in so doing I will not cross the line and try to rescue them. That never works. I have met many people that are suffering from this rescuer syndrome, often it can be traced back to their childhood. Many of them have grown up in an environment of instability and often also in chaos. Because they are used to this drama, they will be attracted to the same dynamic. Rescuers are often not aware of that they need help too, or that they need to break away from a mindset that no longer serve them.
Can this change? When people come onto courses with me, I place a lot of emphasis on personal development and personal responsibility. If you do not take charge nothing will ever change in your life. When these people, with the rescuer syndrome, start educating themselves they come into contact with their soul’s intelligence. This is what happened to me. I used to be a rescuer myself. I tried to rescue family members who were stuck in a drama that they could not break free from.
As these people discover their soul’s potential, they go onto be healers or mediums, or just take the risk to develop other abilities based on their natural intelligence. This takes a lot of self-responsibility and courage.
Many people come to me and say: I have this empty feeling within, I do not know what it is. They try to fill it up with other things, but that just brings them back to the same thing – this empty feeling that they do not understand. If they start working with their emotions, they will begin to discover their true identity.
If you are a rescuer you are still a victim and all the time you are a victim of the past you will not move on, but when you start working with yourself you will gradually begin to live a life based on your natural intelligences.